


Well Met by Moonlight

by Jaye_Voy



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Adult Content, M/M, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-28
Updated: 2016-02-28
Packaged: 2018-05-23 16:04:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,172
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6121932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jaye_Voy/pseuds/Jaye_Voy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A nighttime conversation is the aftermath of a pool game with most unusual stakes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Well Met by Moonlight

**Author's Note:**

> AU (No P/T). Originally written for the 2002 "Die J/C Die" Contest. Although there are a few tweaks, the story's contents (and its flaws) are mostly intact.   
> Star Trek and all related characters and concepts are the property of Paramount. No infringement is intended or profit made. This is PG-13 for the suggestion of m/m sex.

It was a cool, clear night, but that wasn't the reason Tom was trembling. He let out a gasp as the holodeck doors slid shut behind him and disappeared.

He was on a mesa just after moonrise. Long shadows sliced the silver-white light along the rocks, the contrast slashing razor-sharp. Earth's stars burned against the velvet black of the sky, and he took the silence inside himself with every breath. Body and mind calmed, courage gathered, he stepped forward.

The crunch and skittering of small stones dislodged by his steps announced his arrival to the man sitting cross-legged at the edge of the cliff. Tom stopped beside him and stared out, his eyes drawn to the line of scrub and sandstone that marked the place where earth gave way to air.

"It's over then." Chakotay's soft voice made it a statement, not a question.

"Yes," Tom replied. When no comment was forthcoming he admitted, "I won."

"You wouldn't be here otherwise."

Nervousness twisted Tom's fingers into the material of his slacks. He turned to look at Chakotay, a statue of imperturbable calm. The moonlight bleached his face to an eerie gray, plunged his eyes into pools of darkness. The strong profile bespoke Chakotay's claim to this ancient place, his connection to it.

Tom shivered, wanting to reach out and touch Chakotay, to prove Chakotay was flesh and blood and not some specter from the days when the river carved this canyon through rock and soil.

Honestly, Tom just wanted to touch.

The need was as familiar to Tom as the constellations sparkling above their heads, and stirred his soul more profoundly than his yearning to see the planet of his birth.

The shadows on Chakotay's face deepened as he sighed. "I never seem to learn my lesson. I worked with you in the Maquis, and you agreed to help Voyager capture my people. I tried to forget the past and see you for the person you became here in the Delta, and you undermined my authority and taunted me without remorse. I put aside my anger at the Jonas ruse and became your friend, and you deliberately humiliated me in front of everyone." 

His low laugh had no humor in it. "I must be the most stupid person in the universe to keep trusting you."

Tom's fingers stilled, clenched. Dismay dropped him to his knees. "No, Chakotay, don't say that. Please, just let me explain."

"How can you possibly justify twisting my confidences into that stunt you pulled tonight?" Anger and hurt brought Chakotay to life as he finally shifted to meet Tom's eyes.

"I didn't plan it, I swear. It just happened." Anxiety and guilt sharpened Tom's voice.

"It just *happened*? Spirits preserve me if you ever decide you *want* to do me harm." Chakotay snorted in disgust and surged to his feet. He swiftly strode away, following the edge of the cliff.

Tom scrambled to his feet and gave chase. In a dozen strides he caught the Chakotay's arm. Contact at last. Tom yanked his quarry to a halt with desperate strength. "Will you just *listen* for a minute?"

His heart sank as Chakotay shrugged out of Tom's grip and moved away a step or two. But then Chakotay paused almost reluctantly, arms crossing. "So talk," he growled.

Surprised at the sudden capitulation, Tom struggled with what to say. He ran a hand through his hair, considering. Then, breathing deeply once more, he said, "I couldn't stand it any more."

"What?" Even in the less than perfect light Chakotay's confusion was apparent.

"I have to start from the beginning." A grunt of frustration accompanied Tom's pacing, the calm gleaned from the moonlit night forgotten. "You're a very private person, Chakotay. In the Maquis I remember people calling you the 'Mystic Warrior'. Always full of mystery, and strength, and purpose. Shit, you were the hottest thing I'd ever seen, all can-do attitude and sexy leather."

The black hole of Chakotay's mouth hung open a moment, then closed with a click.

Tom waited another moment before he continued. "It was more than physical attraction though. I wanted to *know* you, be with you, find out who lives behind those wise eyes. And I wanted to let you discover me." Tom's smile of reminiscence was tinged with regret. "But I didn't interest you beyond my piloting skills. It's not surprising, really. A dedicated fighter would hardly waste time with a mercenary."

Chakotay's murmured, "Or maybe you were a little too interesting. A distraction at the wrong place, the wrong time."

The quiet admission stopped Tom in his tracks. He pivoted to face Chakotay fully and tried to keep the hope out of his expression. "Then I was captured and figured I'd never see you again. But I couldn't forget. When Captain Janeway offered to get me out of prison, all I could think was that it wasn't too late. That I'd give her the slip, steal a shuttle. Find you again. Get a second chance."

"A second chance to annoy the hell out of me?" Chakotay drawled.

The hint of humor shading the question quirked Tom's lips when he heard it. But then the smile faded. "A second chance to be more to you than just an annoyance. To know the private man, the thoughts behind the stoic façade. But for the longest time you wouldn't open up to me, Chakotay."

"And just when I started to let you in, the spy plot was hatched." Chakotay's arms had shifted from crossing in protection to unconsciously hugging himself.

Tom wondered if Chakotay was reacting to the memories of confusion and hurt. Stars knew twinges of guilt still pained *him* when he recalled those days. "Yes. And like the good soldier I'd become, I obeyed orders." Tom hesitantly took a step closer, trying to reach out with his voice and eyes. "My obligation to the captain, to Voyager, was so strong because I wanted you to respect me. So I fulfilled my duty."

Dimples flashed brief patches of shadow as Chakotay conceded Tom's point with a half-smile. "I doubt the order to antagonize me was so onerous a burden. You seemed to relish the role of arrogant SOB."

"Do you want to know how I really felt?" Tom risked another step. "Scared. Terrified. Because I knew if I failed I was dead. And if I succeeded, there was a good chance you'd never let yourself trust me again. Not one on one, man to man."

"I almost didn't." Chakotay drifted across the tableland to where another cliff face rose behind them. He leaned against it, tilting his head back against the rock.

"What changed your mind?" A bit of Tom's anxiety receded before the rise of curiosity.

"Damned if I know. It's not like you were falling over yourself to make amends." Chakotay's brow furrowed as he considered. His answer arrived slowly, as if he were evaluating each word before releasing it to the night. "I think I needed to be certain what to label you, friend or foe. I couldn't figure you out. By all appearances you were an unrepentant mercenary, turning coat as easily as changing shirts."

Those ageless dark eyes looked at Tom then, and he felt helpless in their grip. He barely heard the husky tones for the blood pounding in his ears as Chakotay confided, "But my gut kept telling me it was a front. That you had just been waiting for someone to *ask* for your loyalty, not bargain for it. Maybe even to prove to you that they deserved it."

Chakotay looked out over the canyon once more. "For my own peace of mind I needed to see your true colors. And the only way I could come up with to earn your trust was to offer my own."

"And so you did." Tom's thoughts warmed with the memories of how their friendship grew, step by cautious step. The occasional pool game, swapping childhood stories here, sharing secrets there. "And I know what a rare thing that is, Chakotay. Your walls are as high as mine." 

He shook his head ruefully. "But no one ever notices. I suppose it's your style. I shout at people from the top of my battlements, keeping everyone at bay. You invite them for tea on the front lawn, all nice and proper, and they never notice that you've kept them out just as effectively."

Tom approached. "But you let *me* in, revealed the private man. Strong, but sometimes uncertain. Proud of your heritage, but surprisingly humble about your own achievements. Stubborn but willing to admit your mistakes. Optimistic, but with a wry sense of irony." 

He stood before Chakotay. "Warm and generous and caring, but afraid."

His shadow engulfed Chakotay, hiding him from the moonlight. But they were so close now that Tom could see the reaction to his words wash through Chakotay's expression. But then the full mouth thinned and the firm jaw clenched as Chakotay's face closed. He pushed past Tom. Arms akimbo, he planted himself at the cliff's edge. "Afraid? That's absurd."

Tom swung around but stayed where he was. "Is it? You haven't really been involved with anyone since Seska, and that was over before we ever ended up out here."

"So? Neither have you."

The reason why almost escaped Tom's hastily clamped lips. After a breath to regain his composure Tom said lightly, "True, but *I'm* not the poster boy for intense emotion and soulful commitment. You know, still waters and all."

"And so you decided that tonight you'd make some waves, stir things up to see what would happen?" Chakotay's icy tone banished their rapport. "It seems when it comes to you my fears were justified."

Tom shivered once more. He could sense Chakotay's tension. The man was ready to bolt. He was so close to losing Chakotay---in more ways than one. "I just...I told you, Chakotay, I couldn't stand it anymore." 

He unconsciously moved to block the path back to the holodeck doors. "The more I came to know you, the more I hated to see you alone. That wonderful heart just going to waste."

Tom looked out again, across the silent canyon, then back to meet dark eyes flecked with moonlight. "Waiting for a woman who will never accept you into her life."

Again, a humorless laugh rang forth. "Well, Tom, you've certainly proven *that* beyond the shadow of a doubt." But then Chakotay sobered. "Did you ever stop to consider that I might have preferred the status quo?"

"Of course you did." Tom shrugged. "Every time you've reached out to someone you've been hurt for your trouble. It's natural to be afraid. Anyone would be hesitant to offer their heart again."

"I was content with things the way they were." A hint of anger, or was it desperation, edged Chakotay's words. "With my life, my friendships. With the chance for love...someday."

"That 'someday' was never going to arrive." With a burst of energy Tom was in front of Chakotay, grabbing his shoulders. "And you knew it. But it gave the appearance of involvement, so you were safe from having to risk your heart with anyone else. But you were hanging on out of your sense of duty, not desire." 

Tom's fingers tightened. "You told me yourself, you didn't feel you could move on while things between you and Kathryn were still unresolved."

Chakotay threw off Tom's grip. "Thanks to you, that's no longer the case. Kathryn has---what was the phrase?---relinquished all claim to my affections." 

He spun away from Tom, staring out into the night. His shoulders tightened. "It's a cruel thing you've done, Tom, to turn what I confided in you into a game like that."

The words burst from Tom unbidden. "She doesn't deserve you."

Chakotay shot him a startled glance at the sudden non sequitur, then resumed his contemplation of the canyon.

Tom insisted,"Kathryn should have cleaved to you---or set you free---years ago. Not kept you both in limbo." 

He took a deep breath, took a chance, took the plunge. Tom moved up behind Chakotay, embracing him from behind, resting his chin on a broad shoulder, brushing their cheeks together. His voice dropped. "I didn't mean to hurt you, Chakotay, I swear it. I just...you were like Sleeping Beauty, locked away from life. I wanted to wake you up, open your eyes to...love."

They stood, silently. When Chakotay spoke his voice was hushed, almost dreamy. "Have you ever noticed that the moon looks so close at rising? As if you only had to stretch your fingers far enough and it would be yours."

Tom didn't move, didn't breathe, until he felt the body in his arms relax into the embrace. Hands rose to cover his and he shuddered with the release of the tension that had gripped him all evening. He cast his eyes to Earth's solitary satellite, now high above them. "But that's just an illusion," he said.

"Yes," Chakotay conceded. "The truth is that the moon is beautiful, but cold and lonely. And forever out of reach." He paused. "But no one tries to stop a man from the quest for her, or ask him why he's wasting his life on such a hopeless cause." 

Chakotay sighed. "You're right, Tom. I am afraid. Of you."

He turned around and Tom started trembling again. But this time with awe at the emotion in the face before him. Chakotay's whisper seemed to travel right to his core. "You say I let you inside my walls. But the reverse is also true. Or perhaps you lowered the drawbridge." 

A small smile waxed and waned. "However you want to describe it. But I saw you: brave and reckless, forgiving and steadfast, sarcastic and cynical on the surface, so vulnerable and hopeful underneath."

A hand rose to cup Tom's face. It was a shocking brand of heat in the cool air, and Tom leaned into the caress instinctively. He kept his eyes open, locked with Chakotay's, wondering if his own soul, his love, his need were just as naked upon his face. In this moment, he was no longer afraid.

Chakotay swallowed and continued, his voice husky. "I sensed the essence of Tom Paris. And I was terrified to realize I'd lost the whole of my heart to you."

Tom closed his eyes and pressed his forehead to Chakotay's. "So you panicked that I'd figured out your secret when I started dropping hints that it was time for you to forget Kathryn and move on."

 

Chakotay nodded. "And told you I still felt a sense of obligation to her." His rueful chuckle---so different from his earlier non-laughs---warmed Tom down to his toes. Chakotay admitted, "Sleeping Beauty wasn't quite as clueless as you thought."

His hand slipped from Tom's face to trail down to his waist. They stood pressed together in the moonlight, arms wrapped around each other, letting the connection between them grow. At peace.

Tom was lost in a daze of happiness and anticipation when a sharp pinch on his posterior startled him back to reality with a yelp. "What the hell was that for?"

Chakotay drew back to say, "Sleeping Beauty is supposed to be awakened with a gentle kiss, not a bucket of cold water in the face." 

He shook his head. "What the hell possessed you to challenge Kathryn that way?"

A sudden flush of embarrassment set Tom's face burning. He hid in the crook of Chakotay's neck, kissing the strong column, and mumbled, "I didn't exactly plan it. The Captain invited me for a game of pool and I asked her what we were playing for. You walked into Sandrine's, so damn sexy and handsome and shit I wanted to kiss you right then and there. But you were off-limits since I knew you felt Kathryn still had a claim on you."

He lifted his head with a sheepish grin. "When she told me to set the stakes I couldn't resist. I *had* to make you see that you were free."

Chakotay frowned. "What *I* saw was that my friend had reverted to typical Flyboy form and made me the butt of the most hurtful joke I could imagine. That I was just another thing to bet on, like a week's worth of rations. I was humiliated in front of half the crew. You really hurt my feelings, Tom."

Tom's regret must have been obvious, because Chakotay forgave him with a smile and admitted, "But I'm glad you won."

The memory of the fierce competition and relief at his victory tightened Tom's arms around Chakotay's waist. "Me, too. She wouldn't budge a millimeter. I thought I was a goner more than once." Tom cupped the back of Chakotay's head, feeling the short dark strands tickle his fingertips. "On the one hand I wished you could see how hard we were fighting over you, but on the other I was relieved beyond words you'd already walked out. I didn't want to see your disappointment when Kathryn finally lost."

Lingering uncertainty made Tom search his partner's face as he said, "She's given up her claim on you. Are you really OK with that?"

"Yes. I wasn't ready to admit it before now, but I love you, Tom. Even though I'm going to be teased for the rest of my days over how we got together." Chakotay arched an eyebrow. "You do realize paybacks are hell?"

Tom shifted, suddenly nervous. "Um, just what exactly do you have in mind?"

"Well," Chakotay drawled, letting his fingers roam the pert backside in his grip, "I figure I have to be as blatant and outrageous as you were, so I was thinking of taking you on that very same pool table some evening."

Tom couldn't believe how turned on he was by the mental image. He never realized he had an exhibitionist streak tucked away in his psyche.

Or maybe it was just that he knew Chakotay would never stake such a public claim if he wasn't fully committed to the relationship.

"That has definite possibilities." Tom knew he'd surprised his love with the casual response. He grinned. "But I have a few alternative suggestions." A wedding, for example, was a very public event.

Chakotay offered his own grin. "We'll discuss it. I'm sure you can be very persuasive." His smile faded as he stared at Tom. "I do love you, Tom Paris. You can trust that. Trust me."

"I know." Tom sobered as well. "And you should know I lost my heart to you a long time ago, Chakotay."

The moonglow shone on them like a benediction as they drew together for their first kiss. Soft lips found their mates, beginning a lifetime of blending, melding, joining.

Contact. At last.

Tom knew then that it didn't matter if this holodeck replica was the closest he ever came to seeing Earth again. He was in Chakotay's arms. He was home.

THE END

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are welcomed with great joy and constructive criticism is treasured as a rare gift.


End file.
